Questions
Specific questions people navigating family court actually ask, answered in plain English and sourced where the answer turns on a rule rather than judgement.
Do I have to try mediation before I can apply to court?
Usually, yes. Before making most private law family applications, you're required to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) to find out about mediation and other non-court options — you don't have to actually mediate, just attend the meeting. There are 15 specific exemptions, most commonly domestic abuse, urgency, or a mediator not being reasonably available. If you're claiming an exemption on your C100, you'll need to tick the right box and provide the supporting evidence the form asks for — an incomplete exemption claim is a common reason applications get sent back, causing delay rather than avoiding it.
Source: Family Procedure Rules, Practice Direction 3ACan I get help paying the court fee?
Yes, if you're on a low income or certain benefits. The scheme is called Help with Fees, applied for via form EX160 (or online) before or alongside your application — you'll need the reference number it gives you to complete your C100. If you already get benefits like Universal Credit with low earnings, Income Support, JSA, or ESA, you may automatically qualify for a full fee waiver as long as your savings are low. It's free to apply, and worth doing before you assume you can't afford to bring or respond to an application.
Source: GOV.UK, Get help paying court and tribunal feesDo I have to pay a McKenzie Friend?
Not necessarily — some McKenzie Friends work pro bono or for a small fixed fee, others charge by the hour, and there's no set national rate or regulation fixing what they can charge. If a McKenzie Friend does charge, they should be upfront about their fee arrangement before you agree to work with them. Ask directly, in writing, before the day of a hearing — not something to discover partway through.
Does my McKenzie Friend need the judge's permission to be in the courtroom?
You have a general right to reasonable assistance from a McKenzie Friend, and the court can only refuse it where it's satisfied the interests of justice don't require it in your case — that's the exception, not the default. In practice, you should tell the judge as soon as possible who your McKenzie Friend will be, and they should be ready to briefly explain their relevant experience and confirm they have no personal interest in the case and understand the confidentiality expected of them. A McKenzie Friend still can't act as your advocate or conduct the litigation on your behalf — they support you, they don't replace you.
Source: Judiciary.uk, Practice Guidance: McKenzie FriendsWhat happens if I miss my FHDRA?
The hearing doesn't wait for you, and missing it puts you at a real disadvantage — the court can proceed and make orders based only on what the other side and Cafcass have said, without your account being heard. If you know in advance you can't attend, tell the court and the other party as soon as possible and apply for an adjournment with a genuine reason — that's treated very differently from simply not turning up. Persistently failing to attend hearings without good reason can, in serious cases, be treated as contempt of court.
Can I record my ex-partner as evidence?
You can try, but it's not a given the court will accept it. A covert recording is only admissible if the court gives permission, which means making a specific application — and judges are consistently wary of secret recordings, weighing the evidential value against the intrusion and the effect on the parties (and any children) involved. Recordings involving a child, or made covertly during a Cafcass interview, are treated with particular caution and are unlikely to be well received. Expect it to add delay and cost even where permission is eventually given, and don't assume a recording is your strongest piece of evidence just because you have it.
Source: Family Justice Council, Litigants' guide to covert recordingCan I appeal a family court decision?
Sometimes, but you generally need the court's permission first, and the time limits are short and start running immediately. For a final order, you normally have 21 days from the day after the hearing; for a case management or interim decision, it can be as little as 7 days from the hearing itself. Permission to appeal is only granted where there's an arguable case that the decision was wrong or unjust because of a serious procedural irregularity — disagreeing with the outcome isn't, on its own, a ground for appeal. If you're considering it, treat the clock as already running from the day of the hearing, not from when you get round to looking into it.
Source: Family Procedure Rules 2010, Part 30What is a fact-finding hearing?
A separate hearing the court holds specifically to decide, on the evidence, whether disputed allegations actually happened — most often used where domestic abuse or harm is alleged and it genuinely matters to how the rest of the case should be handled, not for every disagreement between the parties. Practice Direction 12J is what governs this in cases involving domestic abuse, covering how the court should assess risk and any pattern of coercive or controlling behaviour, and how that feeds into decisions about contact. The court decides first whether a fact-finding hearing is actually necessary — it isn't automatic just because allegations have been made.
Source: GOV.UK Justice, Practice Direction 12J